Let me guess—you’re tired. Many leaders have never experienced this level of complexity, and the weight of current decisions is undeniable. Every choice you make right now has the potential to leave someone you care about feeling uncomfortable, frustrated, or angry. This constant tension takes a toll; decisions require more energy than ever, and criticism arrives from every direction. We are in the middle of an exhausting relational chess match where the need to discern, rather than simply win, is becoming vital.
Whether I’m in a coaching session or reconnecting over coffee, one phrase is on repeat among ministry leaders: “I can’t win!” Some will think you spoke up too much on a pressing issue, while others will say you didn’t speak up enough. Some will view your gathering precautions as shrouded in fear, while others will call you reckless for gathering at all. In a world of polarized opinions, finding the right path requires discernment in community engagement.
Our old ways of thinking will not carry us through these new challenges. Navigating this moment and the coming seasons with wisdom requires more than a change in perspective; we need to shift our paradigms entirely. To lead effectively, we must embrace several crucial shifts, including the essential practice of discernment in hearing God.
FROM WINNING TO DISCERNING
Shift from trying to win to trying to discern. You simply can’t win in everyone’s eyes. No matter how well you think it through, someone will be disappointed or angry about your next decision, so make the most discerning decision possible. Go to the Father in prayer. Ask advice from wise counsel outside your team. Seek alignment in your team and elders. Determine the best decision, be ready for criticism and stop trying to win.
FROM DESTINATION TO DIRECTION
Shift from finding your destination to moving in the right direction. We simply don’t know how this social, medical and economic crisis will play out. We don’t know who will gather or how we can gather in 2021. We don’t know what decisions we will have to make in the future, but we can move in the right direction. You and your team will need to abandon the desire to arrive at this new normal end point and stay focused on moving in the right direction.
FROM CERTAINTY TO CLARITY
Shift from seeking certainty to seeking clarity. If you are waiting for absolute certainty to make any decision, you’ll never get going. We can’t be certain of much in this quickly shifting culture of fake news and bad news, but we can clarify our next step and then make it. Fear can lead to crippling indecision. Discern what your next step is and be courageous.
You can’t win in everyone’s eyes. We don’t know the destination. Certainty is an unrealistic goal. But you need to be a leader who is courageously moving forward. Take your next step, even if you do it scared.