The Wall Street Journal recently shared a statistic that struck me as sad. It revealed how the society interacts with each other, or, in this case, not much. “Americans who say they’re lonely has increased from 46% in 2018 to nearly 60% today.” In a world so connected through social media, smartphones, and instant communications, the world is formed in a bubble of isolation for many. Thrive Global cited former U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy calling loneliness an epidemic in 2017. “No system in society is immune from the facet of isolation that seems so persuasive,” Dr. Murthy said.
In the church world, the epidemic of loneliness has caused pastors to suffer in silence through anxiety, depression, and other mental health challenges. This has led to high-profile instances that have grieved the church. Church revitalization is pressured packed and if a leader does not develop tools of renewal, they too will fall to the isolation that comes with leading.
Here are four ways to overcome isolation in church revitalization:
1. Develop a friend group outside of the church.
While the church can provide tremendous friendships, it can also be a place of great pain. Friends today in the church could be tomorrow’s hostile members using words and actions shared behind the scenes in a friend setting against a leader. I am not saying you cannot have friends in the church, but be cautious about who you fully open yourself up to. Not everyone can handle a pastor’s unloading and the pastor’s struggles.
The efforts involved in leading a rebuilding process are inherently stressful. The eyes of the local church are already on a leader, their hopes pinned on the renewal of the church. However, when change inevitably comes, it can lead to division among the members, leaving the pastor feeling isolated and unsupported.
Finding a friend group outside the church, such as other pastors outside your own denomination, community organizations such as social service clubs, or long-time friends from towns far away, can be the source of renewal and understanding that you need in a time of crisis.
2. Develop worth in your passion not your commitments.
The work God has called you to do is not by accident. God has called you to your current assignment because you have the giftings to help that local church in the season they find themselves. Do not be surprised when it gets complicated. If it were easy, they would not need your giftings as a revitalization pastor and leader. The thing is, it will take commitment not to give in when things get rough. Remember the calling on your life that your worth is not found in the attendance board numbers or on the back of the worship bulletin. Your worth is in Christ—the one who called you to your current assignment.
I love to ask pastor’s what their passion is. Typically, I can hear it in their voice long before I ask the question. You’ve realized by now that you could work regular hours and make more money than in ministry, but you stay because God has called you to this life. So, if God has called you, he will see you through it. Stay firm, pastor, because your joy is in Jesus. Your peace is not in the pieces of the puzzle you are trying to serve but in the peacemaker Jesus.
3. Develop a team that will carry forth the vision.
Organizational leadership is not about who is at the top of the organizational chart but about building a team to lift on the heavy days of ministry. As a child, you might have played on a sports team. Team spirit is needed in the church. Through resilient leadership, the church can cultivate those values found in sports teams. You might have the title of pastor (leader), but you will not be a leader unless someone follows you. In revitalization, the critical development is formulating a plan, developing a team, and staying with the team to work on the plan. When no accolades are given in the trenches of service to others, you begin to rely on someone greater than yourself and others to see the outcome through.
In the hard part of ministry, a team develops, and a pastor is no longer alone but with a band of warriors for Christ, creating a new future in the local church. If you don’t know where to start, start with one person and allow the spirit to guide you. Watch how he brings forth more team members who will lift your spirits, help with the work, and celebrate the highs and lows of ministry with you.
4. Develop a sense of accomplishment outside of your main calling.
Burnout is a major factor in self-isolation and spiritual failure. So, what will you do about it? Yes, you are the only one who can limit yourself to refresh yourself on the greater journey of life. If you are a pastor in a nominal-size church, less than 100, you most likely wear many hats. The pressure of leading will overtake any leader if they do not have an outlet for their stress. Having a hobby outside of the church and ministry setting can give an outlet for renewal. From hiking, biking, fishing, or reading, the hobby does not matter, but the time alone, rejuvenating, and renewing the spirit will enhance the leader for times to come. Do not be one of these leaders who say, ‘I don’t have time.’ False. You chose not to make the time.
Think about it this way, it is better than the alternative of dropping out of ministry. So, if you must get up early or not watch television at night to seek renewal, then do it for your health. Everyone gets the same amount of time daily, so use it wisely. Having a friend group or participating in an activity where you don’t have to think about ministry but can think about the task at hand will renew your spirit. Thinking is so underrated. To do something important in ministry, you need time to think it through. Find the time to be alone in thoughts or a minimal activity where you can recharge by resting yourself for the future.
Ultimately, as you lead your congregation into the future, don’t become a statistic of isolation but a champion of self-renewal and health. The health of your ministry and congregation depends on it.