Over their weekly coffee early this year, Jay told Graham he was stepping down from leadership at Exodus. (He made the move this past spring.)
For both men, default modes kicked in.
Graham wanted to blame the church: Just another example of a struggle for power, pitting one side against the other.
In his addiction to recognition, Jay needed to agree.
Over time, though, Jay has learned a new perspective, one largely shaped by his new friend. He explained to Graham he was experiencing detox from the stage—withdrawal from his need for the spotlight, respect, influence and growing numbers. (DePoy also gained this newfound perspective from his conversations with a Christian therapist whose practice focuses on Christian leaders, a counselor recommended to him by Graham’s mom.)
In a new rhythm of being anonymous and still, Jay had come to recognize cracks of character and patterns of sin. After months of working as a residential teacher at a group home for the autistic, Jay told Graham that in the daily tasks of teaching adults how to tie their shoes and brush their teeth, he sees Jesus more than ever.
And now, while sharing another coffee, both men pray together for the grace to be healed so they can be Jesus to a desperate world.
Rob Wilkins, an Outreach magazine contributing writer, lives in Asheville, N.C.