What We Don’t Trust We Will Try to Control

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matt. 6:34).

Recently, I had the opportunity to visit the command center aboard an extremely large ship. Toward the end of the tour, the captain asked if I would like to sit in his seat. As I sat down, I couldn’t help but be amazed at all the skill and expertise necessary to safely run this vessel.

My friends who were with me took several pictures of me looking like I was in control. But it was an illusion. I didn’t have the knowledge or the experience to do anything helpful unless the captain instructed me. 

Can you imagine what a foolish request it would have been if I’d asked the captain, who was fully capable and fully equipped, to entrust his ship into my fully incapable hands? I can verify, without hesitation, that me being in control of that ship would have been a risk no one wanted to take. It may have felt good to feel in control for a few minutes, but if I wanted to return home safely, I had to trust the captain.

Just as in life, there are dangers in the sea that only the Captain knows how to handle.

Trying to carry the weight of holding everything and everybody together is a role God never called us to play. And it’s taking a great toll on our peace.

Now, I want to slow down for a minute and acknowledge how tough it is to release control, because honestly our motivation isn’t that we always want to be in charge, but rather that we want to be safe. 

Sometimes I catch myself mentally running into the future where I fear there is impending doom and then trying to make wise choices today to steer away from trouble as much as I can. Sometimes this is wise. But while it’s good to plan for the future, we don’t want to obsess over the future. We can control our choices today, but we cannot fully control the outcomes of tomorrow. 

I don’t like that last sentence any more than you do.

But as I’ve been on a trust journey over the last couple of months, I’m having to learn how to acknowledge what may or may not happen in the future but make the choice to live in today. This is what I can control: making wise choices right now, knowing God is in full control. This is what I can’t control: all that happens in the tomorrows to come. Jesus even reminds of this truth in Matthew 6:34, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

The only way I have found to stop myself from reaching for control is to recognize when I’m getting controlling. And in that moment of realization, I need to pause and declare I’m making the choice to begin surrendering to God that which is beyond my ability to change in the moment:

  • God, I’m surrendering this unexpected turn of events. Instead of panicking and missing Your provision, I’m going to look for your provision that is here.
  • God, I’m surrendering this tension with my friend. Instead of rushing to make judgments against her or myself, I’m going to let the Jesus in me talk to the Jesus in her through prayer before addressing this issue.
  • God, I’m surrendering how sad I feel today. Instead of trying to numb out in unhealthy ways, I’m going to get myself somewhere I can worship, listen to Your truth, look for Your presence in nature, or process this with people who are biblically wise.

These prayers are my way of acknowledging that God leads and I follow. Now, please note that I used the word surrendering, which indicates I’m still in the process of doing this. I have in no way perfected this, but I am willing to practice it, and I hope you’ll start to join me.

God already knows how flawed our efforts will be, but keeping our hearts bent toward him more times than we pull away from him is good progress.

Lysa TerKeurst
Lysa TerKeursthttps://lysaterkeurst.com/

Lysa TerKeurst is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the New York Times bestselling author of Uninvited, The Best Yes, Unglued, Made to Crave and 18 other books.